According to Psychology Today, words like “owe”, “expect” and “deserve” should never be used in a relationship. And to an extent, I fully agree.
By: Jason Suerte Felipe
It is natural to have expectations from our romantic partners. But when expectations become obligations, it can cause a huge strain in our relationships.
In a relationship, you shouldn’t feel that you’re under any obligation to do something you should naturally want or not want to do. For example, your partner should not demand your time or demand sex because you “owe” that intimate time with each other. That just makes being in love and sex feel like a chore rather than a relationship.
“Just as the relationship or commitment has lost its value and seems like a mere burden, so do the obligations connected to it; now, you’re obliged to do the things you happily did in the past.”
For instance, having sex with your partner feels like nothing more than just sex when they demand it. You lose that connection when you try to force something that should naturally be wanted. And love should not have to be forced.
Of course, in a committed relationship you do owe or rather are expected a few things like: honesty, trust, open communication and respect. All things necessary for a healthy relationship. But you should never feel cornered to a wall, especially by someone you share mutual love and respect for.
Know that people are not entitled to your body. Even in your romantic relationships. If you think your love is starting to feel like an obligation, have an open and honest discussion with your partner and reconsider the wants and needs from both of you.
Remember, love is a beautiful privilege. Not an obligation.
Do you think should there be obligations in our relationships? Share what you think with us in the comments!
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